I asked the missionaries what they wanted for Christmas and most said "a baptism" so I have each of them one of these. Santa's getting baptized :) hehe :)
A lot has been going on in my life. I've been struggling with making some pivotal choices in my life. Like changing my major in school, starting to attend YSA (which I LOVE), and so much more. There have also been some really rough things going on in my life. My moms surgery being one of the main stressors. Yesterday I learned something that just made me crumble. It was everything that was built up spilling over into this other thing. I cried for hours, I made myself sick, I didn't eat for most of the day today, I barely slept last night. I just moped around all day today.
After attending the missionary Christmas party
Which was a blast, by the way. The missionaries made me feel so good about myself. :)
I went to my first FHE for the YSA. It was... Interesting. I didn't know anyone which made it awkward. The Elders were going to come with me but they got caught in traffic, so I had to fend for myself. Haha :) we looked at Christmas lights, that was fun. But on the drive home my mind kept wandering back to my struggles and my eyes started to tear up again. So I decided that it was time to ask for a blessing. I had talked to the Elders on the phone earlier and they asked me if I needed anything, I said no and they told me to let them know if I did. So I figured I should ask them. They agreed and we met at the church.
So I have this really bad habit of bottling everything up until I explode, so once the Elders asked me what was wrong, I started bawling. We talked for a bit and I felt better just after that, but we went ahead with the blessing. Elder Briggs said it for me. It was the longest blessing I think I have ever had and every word was filled with love. The words "your Heavenly Father loves you so much" were repeated 5 or 6 times throughout and answers to things I didn't even talk about were mentioned. There were even little references to my patriarchal blessing sprinkled in there. I'm so glad I decided to get a blessing. My head has stopped spinning and I'm not feeling as sick. It's amazing what the priesthood and a little bit if faith can do.
I love this church. I'm grateful for my struggles and I'm grateful for the rainbow of blessings that come after the storms of my life.